My ankles that are rapidly approaching 40 years old, are not as spry as they once were. For that matter, nothing on my person is as spry as it thinks it is.
After a week and a half of my new exercise program, my left ankle is swollen double it original size, I can't raise my arms above my head and I have pains in places that I forgot existed.
Note to self: When beginning an exercise program after 15 years, take it slow....REAL slow.
I'm accompanied only by women at my gym. Women who stare at me, grunt at me and flip their hair when they walk by. One instructor talks about the size of my feet (43) while bragging that her shoe is a (37). I explained to her that my 9 year old daughter has bigger feet than she does. Although I am well aware that my feet are big, they've always been bigger than my peers, no one likes hearing that they have big 'anything' while working out.
After basically collapsing on the floor, my instructor told me to "get up and get at it!" I told her, "it hurts!" She said "where does it hurt?" I said, "everywhere...my whole body hurts, even my ears!" She said, "your ears hurt from listening to all those babies this weekend."
They're so amazed I have 5 kids. That I'm sane. (depends on who you ask) That I can smile and have a good time while exercising and that I can laugh at myself when I make a mistake with the language.
For the most part, all the other ladies are stand-offish right now. Just watching me. Seeing what I'm all about. Tripping over their feet to run and listen to me when they see me talking to someone.
It's a good thing I like attention.
My plan is to "kill them with kindness". Maybe I'll make a friend. Maybe my friend will come to church with me. Maybe my friend will bring her friends & family. Maybe my language ability will improve. Maybe I'll lose weight. Maybe I won't kill myself in the process.